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Saturday, January 5, 2008

The Newly-Wed


On the 14th of April, 1997, Kshipra looked breathtakingly beautiful, clad in a heavily embroidered mauve saree, with her long black tresses hanging just below her shoulders, and her face shining even more than the full moon that night in Mumbai. At 20, her eyes were as innocent as that of a puppy. And as she stood next to her new husband, Mahesh, she only had dreams that every happy bride has. Of love, family, a home, and contentment.

Months later, Kshipra walked out of Mahesh's house. She could barely be recognized with her petite body now appearing malnourished, her eyes having sunk in, and the gleam having disappeared from her face. Mahesh had avoided Kshipra like plague, had asked her to sleep in a separate bedroom, and had requested her to keep away from him the same night that Kshipra thought she would lose her virginity. Kshipra knew why when Mahesh came home just a few days later with another man. Mahesh's boyfriend. Kshipra realized then, she was only his scapegoat, to hide the fact that he was gay, from the world.

Kshipra spent the next eight years in agony. She spent sleepless nights crying, and her days were lonely. As each friend of hers engaged, wed, and gave birth, she felt like she was scarred for life. Men walked in and out of her life offering her physical love. But none wanted to marry a divorcee. A scarred divorcee. A flawed gem. A gem who had never been touched. Only been legally wed, once upon a time. She lost all hope of fulfilling the dreams she had had as a bubbly teenager. She would die a lonely woman.

When Shashank saw Kshipra standing behind the counter at the hotel he had checked into, he felt an instant surge of warmth, a feeling of wanting to hold this woman who looked forlorn in a room full of people, a need to comfort her. Months later, they were close friends, and a year later, Shashank proposed to Kshipra. And Kshipra passed yet another sleepless night crying. She knew if she told Shashank about her past, he would perhaps leave.

On the 23rd of May, 2007, Kshipra once again stood smiling amidst extravaganza, dressed in an expensive gold and red saree. This time, she was in Bangalore. She was not shy like she was ten years ago. Her face was not as bright as it was ten years ago. And a fear gnawed at her. Will Shashank, her new husband, forgive her when he found the truth out about her past? Kshipra stood there with an awkward smile. That night, she would tell him.

On the 30th of May, 2007. Kshipra woke up in Shashank's bedroom for the 6th morning in a row. Shashank had not asked Kshipra to leave after she told him about the unfortunate episode of her life ten years ago. Shashank asked her to stay. Shashank had not been angry. Only heartbroken. Shashank had decided to leave her and his apartment. Kshipra was alone, once again. The divorcee would be a divorcee once again. The gem was now cracked.

38 comments:

VeenS said...

now whyyyyyy did shashank do that!!!!!!!!!!!
he loved this girl and.....

how pathetic!!!!

thats not fair!!!

KP said...

Poor girl....:)

Please tell me this is fiction and not real life story........

Scritch said...

It sounds like a morality lesson either against being gay or getting married.

Would anyone care if she left a gay man she never even slept with? And even if she had slept with him so what.

Sure maybe some guys would but what are the chances that ALL would? and 10 years of waiting? I think not, In 10 years even a troll could find a mate. Has this chick tried shaadi.com?

why does her hubby being gay it make her cracked gem?

I have to say, the story is slightly unrealistic.

it also seems goes nowhere.

I think a rewrite with a happy ending or plot twist would be good.

I think I'm getting way to involved in shashank's life now. Gotta go make some tea and wake up.

KP said...

btw...why is it that every story ends on a sad note? man u r giving me reality kick too soon...i have seen to many hindi movies with happily ever after ending! Its tough for me to digest this....may be slowly u can give test of reality......nice write up!

Zee said...

i hope as hell this is fiction

Nature Nut /JJ Loch said...

What a sad story beautifully written and I believe can happen in some cultures.

Hugs, JJ

Solitaire said...

@ Veens, some Indian men cannot handle divorcees. That is a fact. :(

@ KP, everything is fiction, my friend but it can be fact for someone.

@ Scritch, This story has nothing against gays. In fact, it portrays how gays can feel pressured to hide their sexuality in India and thus leading to such incidents.
Also, yes all guys would not but sadly most of the guys that Kshipra met were of that mentality. It could have something to do with the peer groups she was hanging out with, or with the fact that she was probably not an outgoing person and did not end up meeting too many other open-minded people.
Her hubby being gay does not make her a cracked gem. The tag of being a divorcee makes her not so "marketable" in the shaadi market, so to speak.
Also, the story is fiction but bits and pieces of many other people's lives.
I hope that tea did you good! :)
Sorry this story made you feel this way. :(

Solitaire said...

@ KP, oooops..sorry! That's how twisted my mind is. Maybe, I have not watched enough Hindi movies.

@ Zee, it is!:)

@ Nature nut, it does. No matter how open minded we believe ourselves to be, when put in a situation ourselves, we tend to revert back to old beliefs.

Keshi said...

wut a write-up!

Keshi.

durjoy datta said...

i hope it's fiction...
though i think shashank behaved like a nuthead!!!

c e e d y said...

well it is a cool write up - with dates being so precise, almost makes you beleive in it being real - which for some odd reasons - even tho you say its fiction - i see a glimmer of truth in it.

you have tackeled three major social issues
- one being gay and not being able to come out with it
- a suppressed girl who cannot make her own desiciouns because of societal and peer pressure and never probably allowed to speak her mind
- a narrow minded person - for whom purity of body is more important than purity of mind.....

a question though here - how do indian women handles divorcee men??? any inputs

priya said...

Damn good but sad indeed. Thank you for dropping in to my blog

Solitaire said...

@ Keshi, thanks girl!

@ Durjoy, it sure is! And there are many nutheads around like him..believe me!

@ Ceedy, there is some truth to it from some people's lives, but not all of it. Thank you for being able to read into all the themes that I was trying to portray. As for divorcee men, why dont you try putting up a poll? Or maybe I will!

@ Priya, thanks..and you are welcome!

c e e d y said...

Thank you for the survey - will be curious to see the results :)

vEENs said...

thats a nice idea. to start a poll :)

Cosmic Joy said...

It's understandable not to tell shashank when they became close friends .. stupid not to tell him when he proposed .. and really really stupid to wait to tell him on their first night as a couple.

Standbymind said...

this is like dmn bad for her!

:(

Satish Bolla said...

at first, i thought it was jus another of those stories we see in blogs. but da dates made me feel that this story is about someone you knew abt. but again after reading some of da comments, i was assured that this is only a story, but a story that makes you think, makes you feel bad for the protagonist. thanx for hopping by my blog but one more biggg thanx for welcoming my first step into ur blog with such a well written story

Solitaire said...

@ ceedy, what do you think of the results?

@ veens, did you vote?

@ cosmic, clearly she was afraid of losing him...which she did eventually. If she would have told him earlier, she would at least not be in another bad marriage.

@ standbymind, yes it sure is. But I bet you..people will only feel sorry for her again but no one will approach her for marriage.

@ satish, thank you!!!! pls keep visiting!

divya said...

arre u cud give a better ending to this story :( she was already heart broken once :x

Sam said...

i sympathise with the girl all the way... but then to blame shashank for his reaction would be foolish... mere 6 days is not enough.. you've mentioned the reason.. he was heartbroken.. and the reason is imple, she did not confide in him early on before taking teh final plunge... he needs time to cope up with this situation.. soemtime alone.. and then and only then can he come back.. coz, let's face it most men/women are not really cool about knowing that their partner had belonged to someone else..

singlewheatfemale said...

hey girl... just read ur post... i sthi sfor real??/ pls tell me it isnt rey.... :(
way sad story....

c e e d y said...

the results are self explanatory - one who lives for themselves will do it - one who marries because of society wont....

so it gives a clear picture what to look for :)

A Shade of Blue said...

You're a damn good writer. Keep it going!

shooting star said...

hmm....if only kshipra had the courage...who knows shashank might have accepted her with her past...when we are too scared to lose...we actually end up losing

Akshatha Kamath said...

My first reaction to the story was to hold Shashank's collar and ask "How could you be so insensitive?" BUT....

The basis of any relationship is trust. May be if Kshipra were to tell him honestly about her story before marrige, may be he would have felt bad at one instance, but atleast he would have respected and acknowledged her honesty. Now, even if Kshipra tells him that she is an untouched flower, is he in a position to believe it? To believe what she tells is true, the trust basis was not built, instead it was broken before it could emerge!!!

I could see one common thing in all the characters. No one is dare enough to face the truth. Gays being present is a reality. Whether it comes to light or not, it will remain to exist. Though we can't accept them heartily, if we don't discriminate and humiliate them, atleast then such slaughter of innocent victims like Kshipra would stop. But whatever is the reason, one has no right to spoil anybody's life like this, insensitive morons...

Sorry for the long comment solitaire. It was a gripping story, just felt bad at the ending though!!!

googlerocks said...

why the hell didnt she tell shashank abt the divorce before getting married...she has no right to complain abt her failed marriage with shashank...
how can u expect him to trust her after being kept away from such a imp part of her past...

Kalyan said...

nice reading this tale....your writing is just wonderful!

иidhi S said...

Hey dis isnt a real life story na..?//

well i think its majorly Kshipra's fault coz...she should have tried to stand up against it..then wid her first husband...took him to court or wtever - bloddy spoilt her life...

second time she should have been open about it...may be shashank would have obliged after all but he would have been more hurt and felt ditched coz she dint dosclose such a big issue from him....

иidhi S said...

i read your blog and it brought back an incident i had heard, wrote a post on it.

Solitaire said...

@ Divya, I see so many girls heartbroken once, twice, thrice..so why not her too?!

@ Sam, "belonged"? I cringe at that word! Just because you are married to someone, does not mean that you belong to them. But I like your optimism. You think he will come back huh? Good for them!

@ Singlewheatfemale, No its not!

@ A shade of blue, and keep coming back!

Solitaire said...

@ Shooting Star, damn right! Just like the lover who is suspicious of his wife, keeps checking on her, and loses her respect and all else with it!

@ Akshata, thanks for the comment. Yes, you are right. Everyone is afraid of the "dark truths" in their life because our society shuns on them. I would not call Mahesh an insensitive moron. He was only looking to protect himself. If anyone is insensitive, it is US. Us who do not allow people to make their own choices and to live with them happily.

Solitaire said...

@ Googlerocks, she did not tell him about that because of all the failures in her past. She had never gained the respect nor love of anyone after her marriage because of the tag of being a divorcee. Can you imagine the fear that was instilled in her? The fear of losing the one thing that finally made her happy? It was this fear that clouded her judgment.

@ Kalyan, thank you!

@ Nidhi, I agree she should have told him but why she did not is in my comment to Googlerocks..check it out.

gunj said...

y did i expect a happy endin....i feel all d more sad nw!!

*~*Sameera*~* said...

Very well written!

Any relationship should start on a basis of trust and she should have trusted him enough to tell about her past before tying the knot,he had the right to know.Still,she had been untouched all those years and that jerk never considered that fact before leaving her.Arghhh!

willheim said...

well, you never know how the bones are gonna role out in life.

these sad, human stories about the impossibility of relatedness make me ache.

would then one to better find love in eternity than here. here forever broken, forever surprising us with ignoble twists and turns. leaving us wounded, spent.

what wonderful subjects for a libretto. like madame butterfly, tristan und isolde...

Whizkid said...

How do you get such ideas?? Needless to say, a Good one again !

ishqia said...

oh! a very very sad story.. she shdnt have been a scary cow.. she should have fought.. better live alone whole life..then such horrible married/divorced life..