My True Love

He came into my life like my knight in shining armor, but at a very slow pace. I loved another guy. He knew that. He knew how unhappy I was. And yet he did not say a word. All that he did was take my heart away when I was least expecting it. And then I actually fell in love with him. And out of love with the other guy.

I continued to be unhappy. I knew he loved her. Or so I thought. Until he kissed me one night in a drunken stupor and professed his love for me. He told me he had fallen out of love with her the moment I had stepped into his life. He did not tell her that. He did not want to break her heart. Instead, he chose to ignore her phone calls, her text messages, and her e-mails, hoping she would get the message.

I still remember the night we were cuddled under one blanket on a twin bed, arms in arms, basking in each other's love. I felt I was experiencing heavenly bliss until the phone rang. I was startled awake and grabbed for my phone. It was as dead as a deadpan. It was his phone that was ringing. "Priya calling", it said. I grimaced. "What does she want at this hour?", I thought, almost feeling the anger rise within me. I shook him awake and almost flung the phone onto his face. It was too late. The phone had stopped ringing.

It didn't take him long to realize what was happening when the phone rang once again. Priya. How I began to hate the name or anything remotely connected to her. I glared at him as he stared at the phone wondering what to do next. Much to my shock, he answered his phone and pretended he was in deep sleep and had no idea what was going on. It was an act worthy of an Oscar, I thought and tried hard to fall asleep. I couldn't. The phone rang five more times that night and the for the next few nights after that.

I began to hate the girl. How was she not able to understand? Was she blind in love with him? He was mine now and nothing could take him away from me after all I had gone through with the other guy. I had finally found true love. When she texted him the next month telling him how much she missed him, I could not but help feel a sense of victory and achievement about having her guy to myself now. She had lost him and I was adamant to keep it that way.

Its been three years now. We have had our ups and downs but we are still together. Its been longer than his relationship with Priya. And it has been my longest relationship ever. I know that this time its for keeps. The last I heard was that Priya was engaged to be married very soon. I wonder if she has forgotten him. I wonder how hard it must have been for her. Sometimes, I wonder if I was cruel to her then. Maybe...but I do not think there is any point to thinking about that now. I am now envious of her. She is engaged. I am not yet engaged to him. I wonder when he will pop the question. I hope its soon.

With this note, I pen off.

Eight hours later.

I have called him five times today. He did not answer the first four times. The fifth time he appeared to be sleeping. I think I recognized the Oscar winning tone.

His First Time

They met while taking a geology class together. She had walked in late, had found the seat next to him to be the only one available, had ended up asking him for notes on what she had missed, and he in turn asked her out for the weekend. That Friday night, they went out to watch "Patch Adams" and sat there nervously, each with their own popcorn and soda, making no conversation. He felt that it had been his worst date ever. She thought that he was nothing but a nerd. And yet, when he bravely mustered a, "What are you doing tomorrow night?", as he dropped her off at her dorm, she heard herself saying, "Nothing. Wanna hang out?", much to her own surprise.

Exactly 2 years later, he woke up one sunny morning with a tight knot in his stomach. He went about his daily chores as if it was a normal day. But he knew it was not. It was the day that would change his life forever. He texted her good morning, got dressed, barely managed to have a sip of his coffee, and wore mismatched socks to work. In the afternoon, he feigned a headache and took the day off. He glared at the TV all afternoon until it was time to pick her up. 2 hours later, she was weeping, out of joy, proudly flaunting a diamond on her ring finger. "Oh I cannot wait for us to be married!!!", she shrieked as she ran towards their car with excitement. In the next week, it was finalized. Their wedding date was set to be August 17th, exactly 8 months away.

"Sweetheart", she said. "I am so thankful that you are ok with waiting until the wedding. I want our first time to be special."
"Me too", he said kissing her mouth gently.

8 months flew by as they ran around everyday trying to coordinate their dream wedding. Her life revolved around appointments with photographers, videographers, pastors, bridesmaids, caterers, salons, boutiques, and him. His life revolved around their new house, gift registries, travel bookings, tuxedos, and her.

As they both lay on their own beds a night before the wedding, they each wondered how it would be to feel their naked bodies against each other, for the first time ever. Their friends had teased them about not having gone all the way. But they had not minded. They had wanted to wait. It was going to be their own special moment. The one that they had waited for. And it was to happen exactly 23 hours from now, he thought. He slept peacefully that night knowing that he would wake up to the happiest day of his life.

The wedding was perfect. She looked as pretty as a princess, he thought, as she walked down the aisle while she blushed with nervousness. And as they kissed as man and wife, he felt a surge of happiness run through him. "Mrs. Carol Taylor", he whispered to her, as they hopped into their car to drive to their honeymoon suite at the Holiday Inn. She cried and laughed at the same time unable to contain her joy.

Their bed had rose petals on it, courtesy the hotel. They could care less. Before long, he had taken her wedding dress off and was admiring her beautiful nakedness. Within minutes, they were in each other's arms kissing fervently and passionately like they never had. "Go slow", she managed to mutter but he did not hear her. He continued to stroke her, touch her, and kiss her while she let out soft moans. "Are you ready?", he asked running his fingers down to feel her wetness. She nodded her head. As both of them came together a few minutes later, they each felt like they would explode, their entire world rocking, as they perspired and held on tight to each other.

Gasping for breath, he said, "That was beautiful."

She smiled and wrapped her arms around him dreaming of a beautiful life with him.

She did not know that she had the HIV. He did not know that now he too had the HIV.

Innocent Love

He heard the doctor say, "kidney stones" several times and had no idea what they were. All he knew was that his father was not feeling well and that their mother was hardly home. And then one fine day, when he was only 13, his father died. As aunts and uncles came home to comfort his mother, him, and his younger sister, grieving, wailing, and moaning, he heard them say, "You are now the man of the house" over and over again.

Days turned into months and gradually he realized that relatives no longer stopped by. His mother was snickered at in social gatherings for wearing bright colors, putting on a huge bindi, and chewing tobacco despite being a widow. He never understood what the big deal was just like he never understood why his mother was never home, even in the evenings. But one evening, as he rocked himself on their antique swing in their yard, waiting for nightfall so that he could cry himself to sleep, he saw his mother bring home a stranger.

He was surprised. They never had any visitors. And yet, this man's demeanor seemed like he was strangely comfortable with his mother. That night, his mother told him and his sister that she was in love, and was going to marry this strange man. The 42-year-old lanky man with grey hair and smelly feet would now be his step-father. He retreated to his room without much display of emotion. After all, he was the man of the house. And men don't cry. They only toss and turn for hours before they fall asleep at dawn in an eerie house.

Weeks later, when he was convinced that he had lost his mother's love to the stranger who never came home after that, he saw HER, the love of his life. She was sitting demurely on the couch watching TV with a vacant gaze that made her look even beautiful. "How is it that I hardly talk to her when she is so beautiful?", he thought. He approached her without any hesitation as if he had done this all his life. He sat down next to her and asked her how she was. She turned her head towards him, and instantly burst into tears. "I feel so lost", she said. "Shhhh...I am with you." he responded, as he cradled her, stroking her curly hair, and resting her head on his shoulder. That day, they watched TV together, hand in hand. That night, he fell asleep, with a smile on his face.

As months passed, their love for each other blossomed. When his mother was gone in the evenings, he spent every moment with her. They hugged, held hands, kissed, giggled, had pillow fights, snuggled, and gave each other everything that was missing from their lives..LOVE, COMFORT, COMPANIONSHIP. His mother had no idea what her son was upto for she never returned before midnight by which he was always fast asleep in his bedroom.

One evening, he overheard his mother talking to the strange man. And he realized that she would not return home that night before 2 am. He felt elated. These days he looked forward to some alone time, unlike the times when he would crave for his mother's company. Without a tinge of guilt, he realized that tonight was the night that he could plan something. Something romantic..for the love of his life.

That evening, after dinner, he invited her into his bedroom. She coyly observed the candles that lit the room brightly. "Is this for me?", she giggled nervously. "Yes", he said, and pulled her towards him. "Did you like it?", he asked. She could barely answer him as she felt his lips against his neck and as his hand unbuttoned her shirt gingerly. "Oh my God!", should we be doing this, she whispered. He chose not to answer her. Within minutes, they were sprawled on his bed, half naked. While in their own little paradise, they did not hear the door open, and their mother enter his bedroom. She screamed as she saw both her children in bed together....