She was 19. He was 24.
She was from Bangladesh. He was from India.
She was a Muslim. He was a Hindu.
And then it happened.
She had arrived into the United States a year after he had. Being a volunteer driver for the university, he had been in charge of the students arriving that day. As she walked out of the airport, appearing lost, but pretending to be cool, chewing gum like a cow trying to swallow plastic, he could not help but grin. After a brief introduction and loading over a 100 pounds of luggage, they were on their way to the university.
"Where are you staying?", he asked her.
"I don't know", she replied nonchalantly.
"Where am I dropping you off then?", he asked her puzzled and slightly irritated. He had only been told to pick the students up and drop them off at their destinations. He did not want to be in charge of their accommodation too.
"I don't know where I am supposed to be going.", she whispered.
He realized then that she had come unprepared and without having made any arrangements. He also sensed that she was trying to fight back tears. Feeling sorry for her, he offered her to come stay with him and his roommate until she found an apartment. She had no choice but to say yes. And that's how Fatima and Niket began their journey.
On the third day, Fatima confessed to Niket that she did not have the money to rent an apartment. In her words, she had escaped from her home in Bangladesh because her father had wanted her to marry his friend's son. She had borrowed money from her richer friends in order to get to where she was.
"Please help me.", she pleaded with two teardrops rolling down her cheeks, shining brightly as the moonlight fell directly on her face. Niket had a sudden urge to run his fingers through her unruly hair that remained curly all the time. But all that he did was squeeze her shoulder and nod his head. Fatima continued to stay in his bedroom while Niket slept on the couch in his living room for the next 6 months. Fatima did not know that he sometimes went into the bedroom only to watch her sleep peacefully often wondering how it would feel to have her sleep in his lap. Niket did not know when and how he had fallen in love with her but felt empty and lonely when she left home to go to school.
One night when she returned from the library, she found him pacing up and down in the hallway.
"Is everything alright?", she asked.
"No. It's not.", he answered wringing his hands. "I am in love with you and want you to know that.", he stated, almost in a rush for fear that he might never again be able to utter those words.
When Fatima did not answer him and simply lowered her gaze, he felt stupid and rejected. He saw that she was crying silently and knew not what to do.
"I am sorry.", he managed to mutter.
"I love you too.", she replied.
"What?", he said in disbelief and embraced her as she continued to cry on his shoulder. He did not dare to ask her why she was crying. All that it mattered that she loved him and that made him happy.
He began to kiss her tears away, softly placing his lips on her closed eyes, and rocking her back and forth.
"Its ok baby. Don't cry. I will take care of you baby.", he whispered softly in her ears as she whimpered his name.
"Take me inside", she said. "Make love to me."
Within minutes, they both were standing by the bedroom window stark naked locked in each others arms. Niket could not help but wonder how Fatima looked so beautiful even in the darkness of the night as he caressed her, touched her, stroked her and kissed her over her entire body. Fatima quivered with pleasure and begged him for more. Niket gave her all that she asked for and even more. An hour later, they both lay side by side satiated with pleasure and covered with beads of perspiration.
The next morning, they were both rudely awakened by the phone that rang nonstop. As Fatima answered it, she began to panic.
"My dad's here!", she shrieked. "He is coming to take me away to Bangladesh."
"What! No! He cannot do that!", he yelled back.
"Yes he can!", she shouted in anger and sank into her bed and started to cry.
An hour later, her dad was at their doorstep. Or so he thought.
As the pounding on the door began, Fatima enthusiastically opened the door. Niket was confused as he saw the cops standing outside his apartment.
Fatima then turned around and pointed to him, and said...."Here is the guy who raped me last night."
Six months later, Fatima was seen at another university with another graduate student.......
Thank you all for your wonderful responses. I am going to come back and comment on them one by one.
Thank you all for you support!
Please feel free to email me on solitaire2009@gmail.com for a discount code before purchasing THE ELEVEN at http://www.saikiranpublications.com/orderform.htm
I hope you enjoy the book.
I hope you enjoy the book.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
From Bangladesh, With Love
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157 comments:
how did she get student visa if she had no money?? .. It'a damn tough to get a US visa !!
LOL !!
uh i dunno.. wud really have to think!!
Ok here goes my version of the climax:
She asked him to come inside, and within a few moments all three were facing each other wondering what to say. Her father started " I am ready to forget whatever has happened if..". She cut in to say "I love him". Her father continued as though he heard nothing "you come back with me tomorrow to take the flight back. I have booked our tickets".
She felt a chill down her spine.
Her dad then arose and said what she knew would be the last words she would hear from him " I expect you to join me at the airport tomorrow. If you think otherwise, then you can consider all of us there as dead". He then left.
But she had borne enough at home. America had been more than just 'A land of dreams". It had given her the freedom she missed at home, the independence she yearned for,her love and much more. So her friends had been right.
She turned to Niket who had only watched all this in silence. He was relieved that she had not been subdued by her fathers words and she was more determined than before to have her ways. Niket carassed her hair and moved closer to kiss her. The TV was playing Madonna's "Papa don't preach". As she kissed him she took the remote lying nearby and increased the volume to full blast.
Hehe..Its hopeless but you want us to make it spicy after you have finished all the spicy part. :-)
i am not able to come up with an ending, i have this block! but i want to read what ithers hav to say and ur ending too!
the way you wrote the stiry is really simple n sweet!
Salim took his pistol out and shot both of them!!!
He came to say Sorry but when he came to know that she's living with a Hindu... cudnt resist!
How can she!!!
and another bullet sound.. All of it ended!!!
i took exact 40... missed on less than!!! :(
and btw.. i thought the same as Soham, and also the fact that how much rich friends can help,it costs 45-50 grands in Rs for one way ticket!!!
admission fees must be almost 30-40 grands in USD...
how come she managed all this??
hehe... :D
They told him they were a couple.
"I CANNOT let this union happen", he boomed!
Niket "Aw come on. Haven't you read William Wordsworth's quote 'CHILD IS THE FATHER OF MAN!'?
Since you are a father of woman, you are not a child. So stop acting childish and marry us off!"
Abdul was so impressed by his potential son-in-law's intelligent arguments that he immediately gave his permission and blessings. And by good stroke of luck, he was a Kazi by profession.
"Qabul hai! Qabul hai! Quabul hai!"
said Fatima.
"COBOL hai! COBOL hai! COBOL hai!" said Niket, now that he had become a hardcore mainframe programmer with IBM since past 3 months. But no one noticed and all was well.
They celebrated with very very spicy & delicious Hyderabadi Biryani that Fatima cooked Bangladeshi style. I will not tell you the rest of the story cos I would like you to live with the illusion that the family lived happily ever after, and because I dont want to exceed quota of 40 sentences (Was it 40 words???)
Now was that twisted and spicy enough? I even added the hyderabadi biryani to satisfy the 'spicy' condition.
@ Soham,
This is a "short story" for a reason.
@ Sam,
What's stopping you? Think!!
@ Karthik,
Are you serious?
@ Black Coffee,
Kyon block?
Thank you!!
@ Ankur,
When the book or movie comes out, you will have the answer to all these questions.
You and Soham are thinking from a tunnel vision perspective. There are lots of ways to get around that.
BTW, I liked how you think the father's name is Salim! Haha! Sab mar gaye...story over!
@ Stupidosaur,
Hahahaha!!! Do you think that comment is worthy of being an ending for a story on CALM FRENZIES!!
OH GOSH!! I cannot stop laughing here!!
There was a knock on the door. They opened the door. The entire crew of Aaj-tak was standing there. And behind them was her dad..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
The Great Khali-bali :D
**You and Soham are thinking from a tunnel vision perspective. There are lots of ways to get around that.
ok ok... :D
no problemo.. main toh waise hi teri tang khench raha tha!!! :D
hehe
badi bhari hai!!! :D
(tats for Gainda!!! lollzzz)
**BTW, I liked how you think the father's name is Salim! Haha! Sab mar gaye...story over!
thanku... waise 40 words, badi problem hoti hai when there is such limit yaar!!!
Phew!!!
ankur paseena pochte hue!!!
hehe
but u really wrote it nicely... :)
Lolz @ stupidosaur & urv
i think ankur's end suits the story best...thats what happens here at least :D
As soon as he entered the house,
Fatima said, "Pops I gat sumthin tah tell yah..."
Popsy, "Naw Baybayyyh me first!"
Niket, "Neow wayyy! Layhdeys first!"
Popsy, "Awwrighttt!"
Fatima, "Me an Niket are gonna elope to Timbuktoo"
Popsy, "Good riddance my dear little pest. I too got a surpraaaays for ya"
I married Courtney Love Hewitt last Sunday. Now as per her wish, I've come to settle in the US,
from Bangladesh, with Love!"
Yes all my comments qualify for Calm Frenzies.
In first one, it took a decent amount of calm, frenzied thought to make totally mad dialogues for Niket.
In second part, the couple qualifies.
Popsy is the calm one
Courtney is the frenzied zonked out one.
…after 2 months Fatima comes back to US with her husband, she went straightto the apartment. but there she got the shocking news that niket had committed suicide abta month back she turned back saw her husband and smiled...
But no response to his knocks.They were far away in a private compartment of a train embracing each other looking forward to a beautiful life.
or
Seeing his daughter with a stranger on bed.He clutches his hair and faints.Next day fatima reads a report that her father is agoraphobic. A mean smile curves her face as she embraces niket.
huh..
please all of u tell me ur true opinion of my 2 endings..
KARTHIK i think the ending was nice..
ANKUR.. quiet realistic perhaps..if he has a gun... it will surely happen..
STUPISAUR.. hahahahahaha.. had fun.. nice and spicy.. both r just the same..lovely... hahahahaa
urv.. why did the aaj tak came.. baap ke saath beti ko manane..
I am thinking...
The dad called her to take her back for her Sick Son ... whom she left and since the kid is ill... her Dad wants her come back for him...
Or,
She is already married and her Dad wants her come back for the Honor of the Family...
Sorry ... really in a Doomy Gloomy mood today :(
Dont open the door damn it!
WTF are you saying Reema? Wake Up!
Huh!!! Where am I? (smiling dazed)
Is Niket ok?
Who? What? What are you talking about?
Feeling herself over, holding her head in both hands blurted....I just made love - eyaaaah!
Where's the joint? Told you to puff 4 not 40 puffs!
No wonder you are hallucinating!
Her Dad was'nt alone. He had a buxom blonde babe beside him. He said that he was fed up with his wife, shot her, came to the US, got this babe. He wanted all the four to go home to Bangladesh and live happily ever after.
(another one - hope its ok)
Fatimaaaa! Dad in tears seeing her after a long time.
I realized what I did to you and am not angry. After you left you mom died of shock. I was lonely and so I went to a retreat to Bhutan.
I met someone special there who was also lonely and I realized the value of love.
She in fact led me to you and I want you to meet her.
Both Niket and Fatima were confused.
In walks this lady in her late forties and Niket is shocked.
Mom! you.
Her father walked in, his face a sea of emotions. He looked at his daughter and calmly said, "Just wanted to see you one last time beti...the doctor says your tumor is in the last stage...its any day now."
------------------------------
There you have it!!short and spicy and explains why she cried when she came to know the guy loved her! :)
It's not a tunnel vision perspective but a logical engineering mind at its best functioning ..
We have to giv out reason for anything and everything .. and we think logically . by brain and not by heart ..
So cant help it..
hahahahahaha @Vrij's comment! LOVED IT :)
Here's mine:
Her father walks in and rolls his eyes. Tells her this:
"daughter darling ur mad. I was once like u. This thing called LOVE dies soon after the honeymoon is over. Just get over it woman!"
And he leaves laughing.
Keshi.
General Aleem Osmani was furious..
scared Fatima looked from behind the curtains..
Niket opened the door...and they hugged.. as if it was destined in stars Niket Manekshaw was the son of the friend
General Osmani chose for his daughter..
* General M.A.G Osmani was the Supreme Commander of the Mukti Bahini and Bangladesh Armed Forces during the Bangladesh Liberation War.
* Aleem means Wise.
* Field Marshall Manekshaw was Indian commander during Bangladesh Liberation War (He is critically ill today)
@ishqia: I think the first ending is very logical. :)
Anyways thought all of you would like to see the lyrics of Papa Don't Preach. It's a really nice song.
Papa I know you're going to be upset
'Cause I was always your little girl
But you should know by now
I'm not a baby
You always taught me
right from wrong
I need your help
daddy please be strong
I may be young at heart
But I know what I'm saying
The one you
warned me all about
The one you said
I could do without
We're in an awful mess
And I don't mean maybe.. please
Papa don't preach..
I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach..
I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind..
I'm keeping my baby
I'm gonna keep my baby mmm
He says that he's going to marry me
We can raise
a little family
Maybe we'll be all right
It's a sacrifice
But my friends keep telling me
to give it up
Saying I'm too young
I ought to live it up
What I need right now is
some good advice.. please
Papa don't preach..
I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach..
I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind..
I'm keeping my baby
I'm gonna keep my baby ooh oh
Daddy daddy if you could only see
Just how good he's been treating me
You'd give us your blessing right now
'Cause we are in love
We are in love.. so please
Papa don't preach..
I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach..
I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind..
I'm keeping my baby
I'm gonna keep my baby
Papa don't preach..
I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach..
I've been losing sleep
Papa don't preach..
I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach..
I've been losing sleep
I'm gonna keep my baby
Ooh don't you stop loving me daddy
I know I'm keeping my baby
Sorry for this loooooong comment :)
@rn: I am sure Sneha is also having a similar sort of ending. Good imagination!
y cant ppl read that the story needs to be completed in 40 words!!!
expect me!! :D
no one hears u Sneha!! :D
hehe
Cheeers!!!
I'm all for the shooting ending..That's what i thought of but damn, someone got to it before me...But mine ws a little different, in my case, the guy shot the Dad and the 2 got married and lived happily ever after!
please make it a happy ending!
There are lot of points that I think do not sync at all.. apart from coming to USA which she did.. she happened to live with two strangers.. which is so out of her upbringing... it cannot be changed in few moments...
Moreover,
how did her dad know she is in USA.. bad friends surely!
Or how did he get her number ?
Coz u nowhere implied shes in contact with her friends .. or is stupid enuf to give her house number...
If she had no money to stay anywhere.. how did she eat food et al ? no mention of work!
I feel this needs a lot of work...
Considering these facts...
I think instead of dad.. her brother shud come... he always felt that his darling sister was shortchanged. Hence when she decided to leave, he not only kept quiet but helped her discreetly.. Even she didn't know that he was doing it..
--------------------------------
The next morning, they were both rudely awakened by the phone that rang nonstop. As Fatima answered it, she began to panic.
"My brother's here!", she shrieked. "He is coming to take me away to Bangladesh."
"What! No! He cannot do that!", he yelled back.
"Yes he can!", she shouted in anger and sank into her bed and started to cry.
"No! he doesn't know anyone in here. I can hide you. Yes I will do that! come pack.. we will go across the state to my friends place!"
" Its too late", she said tearfully as the doorbell rang.
For a moment, both froze. Didn't know what to do.
Then she heard a voice, " Fatty"
She couldnt stop herself! She ran to the door and hugged her brother. An brother whom she loved so much.. missed so much. In an instant she knew why she loved Niket so much.. he reminded her of her brother.
After the introductions, Aamir said, that was his name, "I knew all about you, but kept quiet, coz I knew you are doing the right thing. I helped you even"
"Why didnt you tell me?", fatty said.
"Would you have trusted me dear? Since your teenage, you were so wrapped up in the fact that you have been wronged.. you left us far behind somewhere"
There were tears in his eyes and hers too.
Niket was moved. But the major thing on his mind was why her brother was here..
Aamir looked at him, smiled and said, "I have come to take her back" before anyone can say a word sideways, he turned to fatty and said, "Ammi is ill. She may die. We have to hurry"
"Ammi ?? Wha.. what happened?"
"She couldnt stay away from you dear"
They both hugged and soon enough she packed and they left..
Niket couldn't say anything. Both Aamir and Fatima promised to return
Its been 15 years to that incidence. Nowadays, it seems like a dream. He sought, got and lost love in a day.. And he still waits.. down the JFK international Airport, he waits and volunteers.. May b someday, someone would be her.. for 15 years everyday.. he still trusts..
And one day it happens! The hair is thin.. receded.. dusty grey.. but the eyes is still the same.. that sensitive mouth is still the same..
She returned as she promised.. 20 years too late.. but by then.. he was long dead for 3 years
--------------------------------
this is my take.. tad too long :P
Lol! Meano!! Ok, I'm going to come and read later. Too tired to think of an ending
@Ankur aka Mr. Brown aka Gainda....
Yeh kya ho raha hai aapko...
Pehle Shrink got Shrunk to Shrek
and now today
*expect me!! :D*
Where dude are you coming to the US?
@karthik
Thanks!!
rn urf Destiny!
@Ceedy
who knows if i may come!!! :D
or may be i m already there... is someones dreams!! ;)
lolzzz
Cheers!!!
"My dad's here!", she shrieked. "He is coming to take me away to Bangladesh."
"What! No! He cannot do that!", he yelled back.
"Yes he can!", she shouted in anger and sank into her bed and started to cry.
---- My version of the twist in the end -->
There was a knock on the door. She was petrified. She cried asking Niket to do something. The knocking increased and suddenly the door was broke open.
She sat back with a sudden start, while her dad exclaimed "I've been knocking for such a long time!. Get off your bed soon and get dressed. The boy's family will be here any minute for breakfast."
She woke up from her lovely dream. It was time to face reality.
@ solitaire - Tried my bets to contain that ending in 40 words.. but 40 words were too less to express the essence of the twist. Hope u like my twist
How can we spice up this sentimental story ??? Anyways let me give it a try ...
Niket called 911 and got her dad carried away and deported back to Bangladesh and they both loved happily ever after :)
btw come and chk my new post ...
interesting to read all the versions..waiting for yours :)
i guess my story ends before the phone rings early mornings.
i hate these frikkin calls....
very well written!!!
Thanx: but we shouldn't promise those whom we don't care for.
@ Shobna,
?????????????????????????????????????
whens this story gonna come???
Now give us your end to the story, am virtually dieing for it!! :(
--An hour later, her dad was at their doorstep
Ohhh Sol Ji... bapuji bahar khade khade thak (tired) gaye honge ...
:)
sneha ji, this story is surely not among ur best(even though, it's not complete). first of all, she went to US frm Bangladesh without her father knowing that with money borrowed frm friends. n how can they both b so stupid(can't find a better word) to get involved in sex a few hrs after they confessed their love to each other. all this made it tough for me to write a suitable ending.... :(
but still let me try my hand in fiction:
her father knocked the door in vain as he didn't hear a response or at least a sound frm the apartment. he muttered some filthy words in a typical bangla slang and waited at the door for a few more minutes.
he was restless and slowly, fear took the place of anger in his heart. he was cursing himself ever since fatima absconded frm home for not taking notice of the things around him. he lost his reputation in the neighborhood and workplace.
it was by sheer luck that he found his daughter was in the US of A. one of fatima's close frnd got married to his junior in office and in some way or the other, he was able to get information by harassing that groom in office.
coming back to reality, he checked his watch n found that he has been waiting there for the past 90 minutes. it was then that niket's roomie came humming a song after returning frm a univ field trip. he was surprised to see an old man sitting at his doorstep. he inquired him his details n found that he was the father of the mysterious girl whom his roomie was protecting(frm nothing) frm the past few months.
he tried to open the front door but found that the door was bolted frm the inside. he too tried knocking the door, called saket's phone only to hear the voice response.
sensing some danger, he called the 911 and the cops arrived in a few minutes and broke the door. inside, they found a small bottle marked poison next to the embraced dead-bodies of saket n fatima. they also found a note addressed to fatima's dad.
"dear dad, i know that you'll never let me marry saket, with whom i'm in deep love. i also know that u'll take me out of this country, by hook or crook. there's no option left for me to commit suicide. saket was kind enough to accompany me to the other world.
your loving daughter,
fatima."
hearing a thud, everyone turned back to see the lifeless body of fatima's father, who had a heart-attack. no one knew that he came there to ask his daughter to pardon him for trying to get her married without her consent.
thanks karthik
Wow, lots of wacky ideas in here.. some were really good. Here`s my take.
~~~
Niket welcomed him in, and asked him to sit down and left father and daughter to speak, while he went in to prepare tea.
All he could hear was sobs, and then a sudden thundering voice.
"Mr. Niket!, please come here.". Niket hurried to the drawing room. Abdul Khader was a huge man, with his majestic moustache and beard, he now looked like a lion ready to hunt.
"My daughter tells me that you both are in love. I have been a harsh father, but it has always been her well being that i've sought. Though it is not to my liking, I don't want my daughter to run away like that again". This time he looked at Fathima.
"Do you know how much of a burden you've been on you friends.? I've settled all your dues. Ya Allah, did Abdul Khader`s daughter have to beg?".
"Mr.Niket, We cannot let this happen. This is not our country. I am taking my daughter back. I give you my word, a gentleman`s word, that when you come with your family and seek my daughter`s hand, I will give her to you. Please let me keep my reputation. Religion is no issue"
Fathima looked longingly at Niket. The tea was by now boiling in the kitchen and he could hear the sound. " Sure.! Sir.", he managed to mutter.
Fathima was still in tears. She had cheated Niket, when she first told him that she was from Bangladesh and about her so called father. She had cheated Abdul Khader, the police superintendent, by leaving the country while on a week's parole. She had cheated her own conscience, when she had told everything to Abdul and both together kept up the same lie.
"Serves me right! May I rot in jail and get rid of this cursed life", she thought, as she packed her bags. She didn`t dare look at Niket's innocent face.
~~~~~
Nice Story, solitaire.
Take Care and God Bless!
With Best Regards,
Srijith.
ok here's mine:
the dad came in almost in an hour...he looked like someone to whom human life held little value and all that mattered was his reputation.
After a lot of screaming, shouting, abusive words which Niket couldnt quite follow. Fatima told him she had told her father that she would not return with him and that was final.
Her father said he would go back and tell the family that she was dead however there was the matter of her 'nikaah' money which he had taken in advance from his friend and spent. He would need to return that and she must arrange for it.
niket relieved at the turn of events asked how much it was, mentally calculated his bank balance and possessions he could dispose and told her to ask her father to leave and he would arrange the money.
Niket sold off his laptop, music system, car and borrowed from his friends...finally he managed to scrape together the required sum.
They went together to the father's hotel and handed over the money.
went back to the apartment and made passionate love.
Next morning Niket woke to find himself alone. Fatima had left.
now this speaks volumes abt ur writing skills .. your premise and story created such a pitiable impression of that girl ... I am sure not many would have even thought abt such an ending ... nice !!! Your ending is a total surprise :)
mast ending nikalyu.... :) majha avi gai... didn't expect this one...
yaar, pura confuse kar liya. didn't expect this type of ending... :(
@ Satish,
Its so funny. You have a :( in your comment and the one above you has a :)
Why are you confused?
@ Neeku,
Look at Satish's comment below yours. He is :( about the ending.
@ Hiren,
Thank you!! You are the first one to comment on this ending. :)
@ Pinku,
WOW!! This was more than 40 words but worth it. Tragic ending!
@solitaire
mayb confused is not the right word. but u can say am surprised by the ending. girls can be like this? so perverted....
@ Srijith,
Oh oh! What did she do in Bangladesh? Sad love story.
Thanks for stopping by and allowing your creativity to flow!
@ Satish,
Do you really think that it is stupid to have sex within a few hours of confessing love to each other? I think its pretty common! Now that you have read the ending, how do you feel besides :(
Sol, did u complete it in 40 words???
@ Satish,
Waah waah! Your ending is total bollywood ishtyle. You lived up to my expectations, movie buff. :)
"Papa kehte the bada naam karega....."
BTW, his name is Niket and not Saket!
@ Nitin,
Ending padha? Baapu toh the hi nahi!
@solitaire
can't answer ur first question? but now i feel a big :) waiting to find such a girl(but not the one who brings cops in the ending)
@solitaire
mine is a bollywood style story??? mayb. next time, i'll write a hollywood one. full of sci-fi. anyways, thanx that u liked it
@ Ankur,
60 words! I am allowed 20 more considering that some people wrote 400 words instead of 40.
Thank you for abiding by the rules!
@ Sam,
Tell me what you think about it?
hahaha
yeh sahi hai... cheatin!! :P
hahaha
waise sahi kaha, kisi ne bhi 40 words follow nahi kare... hehehe
good ki tune 60 hi liye, not 400!! :P
so unlike others!!! :D
@ Urv,
What was the Aaj Tak crew doing there? Trying to cover an inter-religion domestic war?
@ Lukky,
Lagta hai bahut hindi movies dekhi hai tune!
@ Stupid,
The Timbuktoo story looks like it has been set in the 22nd century!
@ Nitin,
Gosh she is mean, isnt she?
@ Ishqia,
What is the connection of agoraphobia and clutching hair?
And also how did they escape into the train compartment from the apartment?
@ Neeku,
Awww no worries. I am glad you liked my ending.
:( Why did she do that?
Nooooo this story doesn't make sense.. Crazy gal or what? emotionless b****!!
Oh Sol.. this is sad :(
Nicely written ...
A very unexpected ending!
Like your writing style :)
GBU
Arti
@Sol
Cant understand y Fatima did so?..is this the ending you had in mind all this time?
hey i thought i'll make fatima gray, well you went a step further and made her black! Impressive.
I read the whole story once again. It's amazing are you a descendant of O.Henry.?
BTW She peddled drugs in Bangladesh.. hee hee :)
Was a great experience. Thanks a lot!
Have Fun, Take Care and God Bless!
With Best Regards,
Srijith.
Nice.....
Liked it - it only gets more wicked
Thank god she was not my roomie ;)
escaping into a train is pretty simple i think.. just catch a taxi and go to the railway station..
well i think thats pretty simple and more explainable then coming from bangladesh to us.. lol
and catching the hair .. because he was so shocked , panicked seeing his daughter in bed with stranger and he feels all dizzy and faints.. so thats a symptom of agoraphobia i think..
Huh???
Sociopath or Psychopath? or is it both??
@ Carolinagal,
You got it right girl!
@ Ishqia,
I want to see how they can walk out an apartment door to catch a taxi while the dad is standing outside.
And are you sure that is a symptom of agoraphobia? I am a psychologist and have never read about that symptom anywhere!
@ Ceedy,
Haha! Thanks!
@ Srijith,
Hi! I am glad you had fun!
Descendent of O Henry? Hardly!! I tried to read his book of short stories and could barely make it through a few! :)
Thanks!! Do come back!
@ Prakhar,
You might want to read Carolinagal's comment to understand it.
No this is not what I had in mind all the time. Thought about it for a few days.
@ Arti,
Thanks dear! Yeah I think a lot of people have a lot of questions about loopholes and I have the answers to everything. If I were writing a longer story, I would have elaborated on everything and still not given the twist away. But too lazy to do that on blogger. :)
Thanks A LOT for your feedback. Really appreciate it.
@ Shruti,
Awww.
Maybe more of crazy girl!
@ Ankur,
Its here and you still have not read it!
@ Ceedy,
Funny ending!!
@ Vrij,
EEEEKS!! Kya story hai!
@ Soham,
I promise all your questions will be answered when the book comes out.
@ Ceedy,
Your second story is "bold and the beautiful" style!
@ Rn,
Ohhhhhhhhhh! Great one! Something like what I would have thought of.
@ Keshi,
That was a very typical Keshi story! One with a moral for young women!
@ Prakhar,
Baap re! How do you know so much? Very realistic story then...
@ Preeti,
Bollywood story!
@ Gunj,
Sorry dear. Tried my very best. Never works.
@ Winnie,
I hope that you have read the end now and have your answers.
Thanks!
Ummm, Nice work if you ask me. But does the end justify the means?
oye... maine nahi padha???
arre bhool gayin kya aap?? 40 words and 60 words!!! :(
@ Ankur,
I think all that you did is count the words.
@ Alok,
Pretend that there was some wild sex that went on with SM behavior.
What can we say? People with psychological disorders are capable of anything.
Sol ji... sorry hai ji...
is baar aapka intution wrong!!!
maine padha.. aur pura padha, par haan story par comment nahi kara!!!
@ Winnie,
Haha! One more Bollywood tale!
And too with Aamir in it! :o
@ Macadamia,
Did you? Its up!
@ Ceedy, Ankur,
Ankur is coming to the US?
@ Mush,
Awww.. Poor girl!!
Dreaming about making love when a guy is coming to see her the next day.
@ Hiren,
This ending is worthy of being published in a children's book.
Get rid of the hero in a nonviolent way and live..I mean love..happily ever after!
i am thinking of it!!!
@ Drozzy,
Thanks!! Did you read my end?
@ Lakshmi,
Thanks!! My version is up now.
Sol, I am not able to comprehend the end, ur stories never end with a meaning!!!
am i missing something big time?
@ Ankur,
That is earth-shattering to know that my stories never end with a meaning.
Are you saying that they are crap, nonsense, and meaningless?
hmmmmm i did read that!
it sureky did kill the sex :)
oh shucks... i cant make a bigger typo than this!!! :((((
i will keep this in mind from next time to read what i write!!!
it is that Sol all ur stories end with a meaning!!
Shucks... i m really sorry!! :(
and i mean it bigtime!!!!
and thats the reason i wrote that i m not able to comprehend the end, so am i missing something bigtime here!!! :(
gosh!!!
i suck!!! :(
and it only happens in ur case!! :(
gosh... really Sorry Sol... never even dreamt of sayin what i actually did by mistake!! :(
and precisely it was
ur stories never end without a meaning!!!
Forgive me Sol!! :(
@ Drozzy,
:)
Haha!! I think its a good reminder to people that sex is over-rated.
What say?
@ Ankur,
You have proven that you are the TYPO KING! Noooooooooo...don't delete the comment. Then I will have to delete mine too!
Yet another "embracing" moment for you.
over-rated or not but surely expected!
i think you should now continue this story.... give it a second twist!
you may thank me for this suggestion by adding bit of sex to it at least this time :)
@ Drozzy,
The only sex I can add here is the next episode she has with another graduate student. :)
This will surely convince people like Apoo who thinks I watch too much porn and people like Ishqia who think all that I think about is sex.
LOL!
but m i missin something, answer me, i m not able to comprehend the end in this one!!!
a lot of questions about loopholes and I have the answers to everything.
Good that you have answers to everything!
I would have elaborated on everything and still not given the twist away. But too lazy to do that on blogger. :)
Do it somewhere else, then :D
And, you are welcome :)
GBU
Arti
-Sol
Are baap nahin tha tu kya hua Baap ka Baap tu tha na.... :)
--Gosh she is mean
nope she wasn't ....
@ Nitin,
Baap ka baap nahi..mama tha!
are baap ka baap tha yeah baap ka mama kya farak padta hein .. maarega tu daanda hein na ...
lol.. dear.. they escaped as soon as she got the call.. so by the time dad reached there within the half an hour time or so they have escaped..
now i m not a psychologist.. but i read that symptom online..
it says .. people who are agoraphobic get panic attack.. and thats a symptom of panic attack..
i may be wrong.. my knowledge is limited..
@Solitaire
Thanks for liking my ending :)
I must say though that you have written better stories than this one... I'll keep checking in. :)
Rn urf Destiny
hey nice put
i appreciate the way u started
check my blog
http://thesolitarywriter.blogspot.com/
ohk blogrolling u if u wont mind
tch tch tch. tera kya hoga ladki?
Anyways, lots of questions here...
Is she so bright/so rich that she keeps getting admissions to universities every year?
For police to come, she must have called them up. Then who that morning phone call from?
Would the police not investigate upon prolonged protests by Niket?
If it becomes a pattern every few months, would the cops not notice?
And why would cops only hear Fatima's side? Niket too is a respectable individual, a bonafide student, and so many people might testify that the two lived together since 6 months and were presumably a 'couple'.
Does she come out of the airport chewing gum every time for every new university, or is Niket the first victim?
"Fatima DID NOT KNOW that he sometimes went into the bedroom only to watch her sleep peacefully often wondering how it would feel to have her sleep in his lap"
If she DID NOT KNOW, how could she be sure of succeeding in her 'mission'. Plus if she was on a 'mission', why wait for 6 months. Why not make the first move. After all Niket is a ->guy<-, right?
Hi Stupid,
Read the book when it comes out. You will have the answers to all your questions. I will make sure you have a complimentary copy.
when?
OMGOSH!!! Soli this was awesome!!!!!!
I have not been able to blog jump like I am used to with work!
But this was well worth it!! I LOVE IT I LOVE IT!!!
~lukkydivz
:D glad u enjoyed it..
~ishqia and solitaire
I think u have not seen the Aaj-tak people's over sensationalized over dramatic coverage of The Great Khali bali.. "jo apne dushmano ko lohe ki tarah chaba jaata hai" and what not..
Since, Khali was her dad, Aaj-tak HAD to be there :D
shit!!!!!
is this in anyway true? does this happen/.... damn!
y does she have to be so ungrateful 2 d person who took care of her 4 6months???
y does she have 2 do dis 2 him???
This reminds me a story :
A girl(blind) & a guy falls in love. The guy asked if you had eyes would you still love me ?
The girl said "Yes". One day the girl got eyes and then the guy asked him again the same question. The girl refused. The guy said This reminds me a story :
A girl(blind) & a guy falls in love. The guy asked if you had eyes would you still love me ?
The girl said "Yes". One day the girl got eyes and then the guy asked him again the same question. The girl refused. The guy said "Love your eyes because you must be looking gorgeous..."
"Kyu kisi ko vafa ke badle vafa nahi milti..."
WTF!
This is ...what why...did she do dat...rather y ws she doin it?
@ Nidhi,
Mental illness..
@ Stupid,
soon!
@ Hobo,
Sad!!
@ Cutepooja,
She is crazy like Urmila often is in Hindi movies.
@ Veens,
Never heard it to be true. I don't know if it happens!
@ Urv,
No!! Not seen it!
@ Cinder,
WOW! Thanks!! :)
@ Ankur,
Arey woh pagal thi. Khush?
@ Solitary Writer,
Thanks!! I don;t mind you blogrolling me!
@ Destiny,
Sorry. :(
Coming up with another one soon.
hey hang on i read something abt a book in there somewhere?....
please elaborate, i'd be dyin to read
unexpected ending!!!!!!!!
well i mean ur imagination simply rocks!!!!!
how on earth can you think so differently?
i like it just the way it is. nothing more to it. just what it is. :) seriously! :)
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